Frugal Mama » Birthdays & Holidays

To Ring in 2012: a Young & Old New Year’s Eve Party and a January Organizing Challenge

Amy — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 00:37:43 +0000

If you’ve been with me for a few years, you know how we whip up a wild yet family-friendly New Year’s Eve celebration, without calling a sitter.

I recapped how we do it this year in this post for Parentables:

5 Essentials for a Super-Fun New Year’s Eve Party with Kids (It’s Possible, Really!)

To keep the energizing momentum going, I thought this idea from Buttoned Up sounded fun. You join others participating in the #GetButtonedUp January Challenge by committing to doing one small organizational task each day — from decluttering cabinets to taming kitchen-counter paper.

Check it all the satisfying but doable tasks they have printed on a pretty road map at the #GetButtonedUp January Challenge.

And that’s all for now — I’m going to tuck back into this special little pocket between holidays. My daughters are staying an extra few days with my parents in Ohio, and even though I have two wriggly armfuls here with my little boys, I’m going to dedicate myself to turning the house around after travel and guests, and writing thank you cards during naptime.

I have a lot to be thankful for, and you are a big part of it!

What are you doing these days?

Happy Holidays!

Amy — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 19:56:01 +0000

From our house to yours, I am wishing you a warm and cozy, magical and merry Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa.

Thank you for joining me in this adventure of finding the fun in the little things, so we can really enjoy the big things.

Take good care of yourself and your family.

Wishing you a new year full of possibilities, hope, and prosperity.

Warmly,

Amy

Got Enough Plastic Toys? Try These Notes Instead of Stocking Gifts (+ Another Free Printable)

Amy — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 12:24:53 +0000

Christmas to me has started to feel “too”: too many gifts, too much stuff, too much money spent on things. Too much wrapping, too many ribbons, too much trash.

Stockings are fun, but in order to “stuff” them full, we end up with more and more stuff. Stuff that parents end up cleaning up, taking care of, trying to find places for, or eventually giving away.

To stop the avalanche of things, last year we decided to fill our children’s stockings with notes. The notes were for everyone in the family — from everyone. Once they were completed, we tucked them in the stockings and on Christmas Eve, the kids got to pass them out.

You can see a clip of me showing our notes to Sarah in Thoughtful, Low-Cost Gift Giving Tips, the third video in the Frugal Mama Makeover Series.

Printable Family Love Notes

When I came up with the idea, I created a simple form to print out and give people:

(Download the template for these stocking notes.)

One evening before Christmas, we sat around the fire and filled them out together.

I was surprised at how excited my daughters were about the idea. Sofia and Virginia, who were 8 and 6 at the time, were helping me punch holes and cut ribbon, corral everyone together, and pass out pens and pencils. And they could not wait until it was time to hand out the notes and read them.

A note from 8-year-old Sofia to her 2-year old brother

Sow a Little, Reap a Lot

To be honest, not everyone in my family embraced the new tradition. Telling someone how you feel requires being a little vulnerable. In a way, it’s easier to just go out and buy something.

But like so many frugal ideas, love notes stuffed in stockings are not just about saving money. They make people feel good. And it also means less time running around shopping, less waste and clutter, and less worry about buying enough.

At the same time, we get more. More quality time together, more connecting with family, more memories.

So the bit of extra effort is rewarding, and makes us happy. Happiness is the whole point anyway, isn’t it?

Even Coco the cat got some love notes

How to Pass Love Notes on Christmas (or New Year’s or Any Day)

If you’d like to try it yourself, you can download the Stocking Notes (pdf) and print out several sheets.

Like the coupon books, you just fold the paper in half, then half again, and cut down the folds. We closed each note with a hole punch and a tiny ribbon, but the notes could just as easily be stapled.

Coco, my parents' cat, curled up with the stocking notes

I could see notes like these being exchanged on birthdays, Thanksgiving, or other special occasions. Or just because.

This holiday and always, I am wishing you love, simplicity, and peace.

Free Printable Coupon Favor Book for the Kids + Easy Step-by-Step Instructions

Amy — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 12:33:15 +0000

We want to show our children our love on birthdays and holidays. But we don’t want to clutter our houses with more toys, or spend money that should really go into a savings account. A book of coupon favors is a perfect solution.

Even though I vaguely remember favor tickets from my childhood, I was re-introduced to the idea by the Center for a New American Dream, an organization that is trying to redefine the American dream towards “what really matters: creating a meaningful life, contributing to community and society, valuing nature, and spending time with family and friends.”

When I was reading more about the New American Dream’s ideas for simplifying and de-commercializing the holidays, I was intrigued that the most memorable family gifts for psychologist Tim Kasser, author of the High Price of Materialism, are coupons for favors. On Christmas Eve, he and his wife create tickets with colored pencils for things such as:

Get to skip fruit or vegetable (and still eat dessert)
Stop everything and play a game with me (or read me a story)
Get to stay up 15 minutes later
Be excused from cleaning up the mess after playing

He says that he and his wife have even received coupons in return for back massages, taking out the compost, or no fighting all day.

I loved the idea so much that I created a printable coupon book (OK, it was also because I’m kind-of a neat-freak). I even recommended the idea to Sarah (a participant in the Frugal Mama Makeover Series) who was looking for ways to keep Christmas fun for the kids without getting more into debt. See my article at TLC — 7 Ways to Spend Less on Gifts and Still Be Generous — and the companion video below.

Make This Coupon Book in 1/2 Hour

This printable ticket book is so simple that it requires no measuring and minimal cutting. And you don’t have to have a paper-cutter (that’s just me being obsessive).

Supplies

Printer
8.5″ x 11″ paper
Scissors
Stapler (or ribbon — see below)

Optional Supplies

paper cutter (for super straight lines)
hole-puncher
ribbon

Step-by-Step Instructions

Download my coupon book cover sheet (pdf). Print one copy.

(I used card stock for the cover by feeding it into the manual slot of our old laser printer, and our new printer takes card stock right in the paper tray. Regular copy paper is fine too.)

Download the coupon page template (pdf). There are 4 per page, so if you print 10 pages, you’ll get 40 coupons.

As you can see, I printed my pages on a different colored paper, because I had it lying around, but white looks crisp and clean.

Fold the cover page in half, then in half again, so you have 4 equal sections.

Cut the cover into equal fourths by cutting along the folds. Either with an inexpensive paper-cutter or…

with scissors.

Now for the coupons themselves. Fold them in half and then half again, just like the cover, so you get 4 coupons per sheet.

Cut them into 4 tickets by cutting along the folded lines, either with a paper cutter, or…

with scissors.

Now you should have a front and a back cover, plus a stack of coupons.

Stack the front and back covers with the pages together like a book, making sure all the coupons are facing the right direction.

Either staple them together, or punch two holes in one end with a hole-puncher.

If you use the hole-punch method, you can tie them together with a short length of ribbon. (I used ribbon recycled from birthday presents.)

Feed the ribbon from the top to the bottom and then up to the top again.

So you can tie the bow in the front.

Write who the book is for, and who it’s from. (Coloring in the title with colored pencil was kind-of fun, but I’m not sure it made it look any better.)

Fill in each ticket. I love writing with a thin Sharpie.

And voila’!

See my Printables page for more fun free stuff to print out.

So what else did I give my kids besides staying up later? Here are some of our past favors, but the privileges that your kids would want (and that you are willing to grant them) will probably be different.

1/2 hour of one-on-one time with Dad (or Mom)
watching a movie together this weekend
choosing what’s for dinner tonight
a playdate this week
skipping a chore this weekend
an extra story tonight

My kids have outgrown some of these. Except skipping chores — that’s timeless. Do you know where I can buy some of those?

How to Make Gourmet Hot Chocolate Mix (+ Cheap Gift Packaging Idea & Printable)

Amy — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 21:51:45 +0000

Make extra of this hot chocolate, because you’ll want to keep some luxury for yourself.

I looked a long time to find the perfect recipe. I wanted one that would be complex-tasting yet simple to make. Plus I wanted one that was deep and chocolatey, not sweet and cloying.

I’m happy to say, this hot cocoa recipe is it. It’s instant: no whisking and no heating (i.e. burning) milk in a pan. It’s rich but it’s not heavy. And most importantly, it’s like drinking warm European chocolate. When are you not in the mood for that?

Gourmet Hot Chocolate Recipe

(adapted from Alton Brown’s Hot Cocoa Recipe)

If you love chocolate, you’ll want your mix to be made with the best-tasting cocoa powder. Dutch-processed cocoa is going to give you the strongest chocolate taste without acidity or bitterness. Among the dutch-processed cocoa powders, the Belgian brand Callebaut got the highest mark in a Cook’s Illustrated blind taste test, so that’s the one I use.

Makes 5 1/2 cups of dry mix

2 cups powdered sugar
1 cup Dutch-processed cocoa (like Callebaut)
2 1/2 cups powdered non-fat milk
1 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons cornstarch

Fill mug halfway with mix. Pour in hot water. Mix well.

(It might sound like a lot of mix, but remember that the largest ingredient is powdered milk.)

How to Make a Big Batch for Giving

Use a very-clean plastic bin to mix up a large batch

The above recipe only makes enough for about one family, so I figured out how to make a ton so that we could give it away to friends, relatives, and teachers.

Since the cocoa powder is the most expensive and perishable ingredient (a 2.2 lb. bag goes for around $30 online and it should be used within several months or it loses flavor), it makes sense to buy the other ingredients based on how much you can get out of a bag of cocoa.

There are 8 cups of cocoa powder in a 2.2 lb. (1 kilo) bag of Callebaut. To make a batch of hot chocolate using the whole bag, you’ll need 16 cups of powdered sugar, and 20 cups of powdered milk. That should make a total of 44 cups of hot chocolate mix and about 11 gift cans (if you use 10 oz. coffee cans which hold about 4 cups each). So here is my recommendation for what to buy:

Shopping List (for a Big Batch)

Ingredients for a double-double batch of gourmet hot chocolate

One 2.2 lb. bag of Callebaut cocoa powder
Two 2 lb. bags of powdered sugar
One 1 lb. bag or box of powdered sugar (you’ll have some left over)
4 lbs. of powdered milk
cornstarch
salt

As you can see from the photo, this year I doubled my big batch and bought 2 bags of cocoa powder. I’m psyched to have all the hot chocolate to give away, but it is quite a messy operation to mix it all up. This year, I scrubbed clean a plastic bin that used to house Christmas decor and used it to stir up the mix, which was better than having to do several batches in a large bowl.

Big Batch Recipe of Gourmet Hot Chocolate

Makes 44 cups of mix (about 10 cans of hot chocolate)

One 2.2 lb. bag of Callebaut cocoa powder
Two 2 lb. bags plus 2 cups of powdered sugar
20 cups of powdered milk
8 teaspoons of salt
16 teaspoons of cornstarch

Mix together in a very large container, making sure that all the ingredients are incorporated by scraping the bottoms and sides. Spoon into containers and label with directions and ingredients (see below).

Packaging the Hot Chocolate Mix

I love drinking espresso at home, so I’ve been saving coffee cans since last Christmas when we first made hot chocolate gifts. (Read here about why I love Bustelo Cuban espresso.)

We covered the cans with paper bags.

Every brand has a slightly different can size, so you’ll need to measure from top to bottom and around the middle. Bustelo requires a 5 3/8″ x 13″ rectangle to cover the can, which we simply attached with school glue.

Measuring trick: if you don’t have a tape measure, wrap a ribbon or towel around the object to be measured, mark the end point, and then lay the fabric against a ruler.

We then wrote “Hot Chocolate” on a 4-inch doily and glued it on the front and top using regular school glue.

Then I noticed that I could just pull off the Bustelo label and get a plain silver can. So I saved time and effort by just attaching the labels to the aluminum can. And I think they look just about as good. Has anyone coined the term frilly-industrial?

Printable Labels for Ingredients and Directions

Here is a PDF you can download and use to print labels for the hot chocolate. I only did the ingredients and directions because I thought handwriting the “Hot Chocolate” looked more homey.

Download the ingredients and directions label for hot chocolate

These go perfectly with Avery shipping labels #18163 (available in 10-sheet packs).

And that’s about it! The hot cocoa mix is not hard to make — you can mix up a big batch and package it all simply in one afternoon. And don’t forget to save some for yourself — you deserve it. :-)

Money- and Stress-Saving Holiday Tips & Tricks (and a Peek at My Personal Christmas Frenzy)

Amy — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 16:30:47 +0000

We are busy-busy making hot chocolate mix, double-batches of chili, and toffee-chocolate bark. Our toddler Luke is making some pretty spectacular messes by shattering his applesauce bowls on the floor, scrounging in the cabinets for candy (and finding it), and ripping delicate paper snowflakes off windows and doors.

(By the way, Sara noted hilariously in the comments that the toffee is more like Christmas crack. Um, yeah. We have since discovered that a way to cut the sweetness — and the addiction — is by using dark chocolate chips.)

Meanwhile I’m stealing moments to bang away on the last two articles for the Frugal Mama Makeover series and freaking out that I’ve fallen behind schedule on Christmas presents this year. I’ve got a plan for some homemade gifts, though, and I’m confident that I can solve the rest with my free trial of Amazon Prime.

I’m so excited that my sister Jenny and her husband are coming on Friday from Argentina, and we’ll be heading out next week to the family “farm” to see our parents. The trip is about seven hours, but I’m stocking up on nostalgic Rankin/Bass Christmas movie classics from my 1970s childhood, like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and The Year Without Santa Claus, which will make me actually want to sit in the back with the kids and suitcases in our soon-to-be crammed Honda Pilot.

Speaking of, my car desperately needs an interior detailing, and I even asked for the luxury service as a Christmas present, but my husband thinks it’s not a good-enough gift. I read somewhere that women feel happier when their life is organized and tidy, but I have to give him credit for wanting to make the holiday more romantic.

My daughter Virginia has a late December birthday, but we celebrate earlier in the month and our favorite kind of party has become a sleepover. Despite the late night, I have to say it’s my most frugal and low-stress party choice. We made a bunch of sugar cookies and the kids decorated them as an activity (followed by painting nails and telling gross stories), and then we sent the cookies home as party favors.

So much has been going on, that I haven’t been pointing out the articles that I write at Parentables. So I thought I’d at least round up the holiday stuff in case it could be helpful around now.

Later in the week, I’ll publish our recipe for gourmet hot chocolate and some ideas on how to gift-wrap it in a frugal way. In the meantime, here are those posts I promised.

How I Simplify Christmas Cookies

Amy — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 19:26:59 +0000

This post is part of a new series called How I Simplify.

I make the same Christmas cookies every year.

We discovered our favorite recipe a few years ago at a cookie exchange in New York City. This super-fast recipe for chocolate-covered toffee satisfies all my cravings for butterscotch and chocolate, sweet and salty, crunchy and creamy.

The kids love the chance to sprinkle on colorful nonpareils. In fact, we all think they’re so delicious, it’s hard to give them away (the reason we make them in the first place).

So why complicate things by trying a new recipe each year?

One day I can imagine getting a kick out of making dozens of batches of different cookies (like my friend, Nancy, who believes that holiday rituals are a great way to downplay gifts). But right now, I’m just trying to survive. With Christmas cookies. So I’m sticking with this simple tradition.

Here’s the step-by-step and short version of our recipe. (I swear, they take less than 15 minutes to make.)

Do you have an easy Christmas cookie recipe that is your go-to favorite?

p.s. I’m still accepting ads as part of my offer of free advertising to Frugal Mama readers. If you need help creating a 180 x 150 image, try the $5 solutions at Fiverr (sort by user ratings).

How I Simplify Thanksgiving

Amy — Thu, 24 Nov 2011 20:56:48 +0000

This post is part of a new series called How I Simplify, in which I’ll share how I try to make life more simple. Readers: please send in your own simple ideas to tips@frugal-mama.com.

We have been hosting the Thanksgiving feast for years now. Enrico’s family in Italy doesn’t celebrate the holiday, and my parents are far away in Ohio. Since we usually make the trek to our family farm for Christmas, Thanksgiving is usually spent on our own or with friends.

I’ve been making the whole menu for ten or so years, and last night, as the girls and I were making the cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, and stuffing, I was thinking how doing Thanksgiving was totally not intimidating anymore. Sure, part of it is practice, but here are some other ways we keep it doable.

Stick to the Tried and True

We don’t try new-fangled recipes. We make our family’s traditional recipes every year.

We don’t eat the stuff but once a year, so it’s not like anyone gets sick of it. And the kids really look forward to the same tastes and smells.

Make it Early

Just about everything, besides the turkey, can be made ahead of time. Cranberry sauce can be stored in the fridge for days, as well as some of the more labor-intensive dishes like stuffing. Last night we completed all but the last step of the mashed potato recipe.

Sometimes I’ll even make the pie filling ahead, then just pour it into the pie shells the day of.

Don’t Deep-Fry the Turkey

When I started out doing Thanksgiving, the turkey was the thing that instilled the most fear. When you have guests, timing can be sometimes a little tricky (nothing that isn’t solved with some wine and music, though).

I looked at all sorts of cookbooks and consulted turkey gurus, but now I just cook the bird according to the package directions. This morning I didn’t even turn the turkey, and I barely even basted it, and it came out just the same!

Same simple cooking method goes for the cranberry sauce: we love the whole berry recipe on the back of the Ocean Spray package, and it couldn’t be easier.

Take Shortcuts

“If you can buy something that tastes homemade, go for it,” says cooking teacher and friend, Shirley Tenhover, who recommends the ready-made Bob Evans mashed potatoes.

If you are hosting Thanksgiving, I agree that you should feel completely justified in giving yourself a break. In years past, I’ve used those ready-made mashed potatoes or steam-and-serve green beans, and the roll-and-bake pie crusts are just as good as anything I could make.

Gravy is Overrated

I have come to the conclusion that making the gravy from pan drippings and the just-right combo of flour thickener and broth, while everyone is waiting and the turkey is getting cold, adds a level of stress that is not worth the taste pay-off.

One year I tried to avoid the heat-of-the-moment marathon by making gravy ahead of time. The New York Times’ recipe, which went on and on about how a good gravy enriches the entire meal, required buying separate turkey parts and making home-made broth in a two-day process. When it came time to finally serve the meal, nobody even said a word about the gravy.

This year I just poured store-bought gravy into a ceramic pitcher and it was delicious.

Skip the Veggies

What? Besides a bowl of crunchy raw celery, we don’t bother most times with a cooked vegetable dish. Green veggies are not the real stars of the Thanksgiving show, so why try to crowd the stage?

I hope your Thanksgiving is peaceful and restorative. And for stopping by and reading, as always, thank you.

The Best $10 Birthday Present You’ll Ever Need

Amy — Tue, 14 Jun 2011 18:14:23 +0000

I’m sharing one of my secrets in this post today at Parentables. What is your favorite go-to gift?

When my daughters were given this unisex, low-tech, all-ages, indoor-outdoor toy, I knew we had found the birthday present panacea. Read more…

Go Shopping to Celebrate Earth Day: 5 Inexpensive Products to Save the Planet

Amy — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 14:17:08 +0000

Making fairy beds out of walnut shells and pinecone birdfeeders are great and all, but sometimes a mom needs to celebrate Earth Day with manicured fingernails and a glowing laptop.

Here are my top guilt-free ways to ring in April 22 with a credit card and a clean conscience.

Please click over to Parentables, where I contribute twice a week, to read the article.

Happy Earth Day Eve!

Photo credit

Easter Cupcakes: Make These Robin’s Nest Beauties in No Time

Amy — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 09:50:56 +0000

There is nothing un-fun about making these cupcakes. Kids love to sort out all the blue eggs and press them into the coconut icing.

My son Mark has an April birthday, and so we’ve gravitated towards an Easter theme. The year before we made these Chick and Egg Easter Cupcakes, but we wanted to try something new.

We found a picture of these robin’s egg cupcakes at Death by Cupcake, and we think they taste as good as they look!

Robin’s Nest Easter Cupcakes

Makes 24 cupcakes

1 package of sweetened coconut flakes, toasted
72 blue speckled candy eggs (you’ll need 3 bags of Cadbury’s Mini Eggs if you want 3 blue eggs per cupcake)
1 batch of Yellow Cupcakes and Butter Cream Icing

If you can’t find pre-toasted coconut flakes, just bake the flakes in a single layer on a cookie sheet at 350 degrees F. Watch carefully, and toss occasionally, for about 5 minutes or until they turn light brown.

Once your cupcakes are baked and frosted, roll the top of the cupcake into the coconut flakes, leaving the very center free. Press three Cadbury eggs into the center, and voila’!

How to Throw a Last Minute New Year’s Eve Party

Amy — Thu, 30 Dec 2010 01:00:06 +0000

In case you missed this post last year, I thought I’d update it and republish, because the message is worth repeating: even though we have kids, it doesn’t mean the party’s over!

When I was single, New Year’s Eve always presented a dilemma: restaurants and organized parties charged an arm and a leg, but how to make the night special?

Now that we have children, finding and paying a babysitter doubles the premium for a night out.

Over the past few years, we’ve developed a new tradition of throwing a small party: we invite a few couples over for dinner and dancing. So kids can be involved, we celebrate midnight with the Brazilian islands: at 9 p.m. Another hour of dancing and carrying on, and there’s still time for a good night’s sleep (or another party for guests who are still cool enough).

Here’s how to quickly put together a little bash that won’t break the bank, but will be easy enough that you’ll want to repeat it year after year.

Set Your Clocks to Midnight…Somewhere

It gets dark early these days, so it’s easy to trick yourselves into believing the night is not young.

My friend Eve arranges her kid-friendly parties around Morocco’s celebration at 7 p.m. To celebrate at 8 p.m., call it an Azores festa. My parents and their friends line up with Buenos Aires and make the ball drop at 10 p.m. (Tailor your own party by finding out who is chiming in the new year when.)

Allow about an hour for appetizers and chatting, an hour or two for eating dinner (depending on whether you’ll have a separate seating for the kids), and at least an hour for toasting “midnight,” dancing, and generally acting silly.

Gather Your Guests

Use the phone (or email) to get instant responses so you can start planning. To make the home party a little more glamourous, ask people to get a little fancy or to wear something crazy.

Hit the Dollar Store

Grab some noisemakers, crazy hats and streamers. While you’re there, pick up candles of all sizes from tea lights to sticks to pillars.

Plan the Menu

To sail into the new year with ease, forget fancy recipes. Make the dishes that you know best: your guests will be delighted to be treated to dinner no matter the fare, and you’ll be able to relax and enjoy the party.

Want to get more elaborate? Babble just published recipes for 7 traditional and lucky New Year’s dishes from around the world, including ring-shaped cakes that symbolize wholeness or leafy greens that represent folded money.

Here are some more fast and filling ideas.

Appetizers:

Assorted cheese and crackers, mixed olives, and cocktail nuts; or
Toasted baguette slices with artichoke spread, and assorted salami slices; or
Shrimp cocktail, and smoked salmon and capers on crostini.

Main course (served with crusty bread slathered with butter):

Lentils and sausage (a classic Italian meal at the new year, since legumes symbolize money and pork has its own lucky associations); or

Spaghetti with a meaty tomato sauce; or
Pot roast with oven fries.

Side dish:

Salad with unusual toppings like pomegranate seeds and almonds, sliced pear and goat cheese, or pistachios and slivered parmesan; or
Kale chips; or
Oven-roasted asparagus.

Dessert:

Ask your guests to bring the sweets; or
Make an encore of (easy and seasonal) pumpkin and pecan pie; or
Colorful and frivolous candy or cookies like our favorite Bon-Bons.

Don’t Forget the Drinks

Wine, beer and champagne are perfect items for your guests to chip in. (You might want to have a bottle of bubbly on hand, just in case.) And don’t forget some sparkling grape juice or other fizzy drinks for the kids and designated drivers.

Give a Thought to Decor

Use the party hats and horns to decorate the house and table. Christmas decor (like stars, snowflakes, tinsel, and silver and gold balls) easily add sparkle to the night. Dim the lights and place candles everywhere (obviously keeping in mind young children and fire hazards).

Line Up the Music

For arrival and cocktail hour, we like lounge music. Dinnertime: something smooth and rich like Andrea Boccelli or Il Divo. Party hour: dance music or nostalgic favorites from the 70s, 80s or 90s.

Besides the shameless singing, dancing and hat-donning, this is the one time of year we allow kids to dance on couches and coffee tables (okay, the grown-ups do it a little bit too).

And hey, how can the neighbors complain when it’s all over at 10 p.m.?

It’s not too late to share an organizing tip or shortcut for the chance to win $250 from the authors of Pretty Neat. Comment here now!

Photo credit: lentils

The Most Fun Way to Downplay Gift-Giving

Amy — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 17:04:21 +0000

This week I had fun writing an article for Slow Family Online about holiday traditions and their power to take the pressure off presents: Downplay Gift-Giving and Bring up Ritual, Meaning and Fun.

Ever heard of the Slow Movement? Slow Food “was founded in 1989 to counter the rise of fast food and fast life, the disappearance of local food traditions and people’s dwindling interest in the food they eat, where it comes from, how it tastes and how our food choices affect the rest of the world.”

Slow Parenting is about turning back the pace of modern life as it applies to raising children.

Founder of Slow Family Online and Social Media Director for Children and Nature, Suz Lipman explains that Slow Parenting is about:

allowing free play
using resources wisely to help the planet and ourselves
getting better in touch with our food, lives and health
reclaiming lost tactile arts, and
forming healthy communities and loving families

I feel naturally drawn to the Slow Movement. Our tight budget has been a catalyst, forcing me to slow down, to make things by hand, to take advantage of playgrounds and nature, and to try to ignore the hype of our commerce-driven world.

You can read more about slow parenting at Wikipedia, or by subscribing to Slow Family Online.

I hope you enjoy the article about how to up-play holiday traditions — I consulted an author and friend who often writes about ritual — and I think you’ll find lots of helpful tidbits and ideas.

Sincerely,

Amy

9 Ways to De-Stress and Spend Less Over the Holidays

Amy — Tue, 07 Dec 2010 15:50:04 +0000

Check out Dagmar’s Momsense, a refreshingly opinionated blog about attachment parenting and much more, where I wrote a guest post this weekend called 9 Ways to De-Stress and Spend Less Over the Holidays.

The words of wisdom come not from me (I don’t feel very wise anyway), but from a grandmother to six and mentor mother at our Syracuse chapter of Mother of Preschoolers.

When you’re trying to be frugal, simplifying is, well, not simple. Yes, you might not spend as much on gifts and toys that will clutter your life, but instead you might take on time- and labor-intensive projects.

I have a few friends in need right now. If they lived close by, I’d bring them meals or invite them over for dinner or watch their children. But they are long-distance, and when I thought again and again about what I could do for them, I realized that something made with my hands and time would show them I cared much more than a store-bought gift.

So while I’ve placed a priority on getting some care packages out, I’ve decided that Christmas cards will become New Year’s cards, and I’ll limit other December obligations to only the essentials.

One of my daughter’s birthdays is in December too — the 21st, at that — but we held a little sleep-over party for her this weekend. When she was three and four years old, we’d held parties on her half-birthday (in July) to avoid crowding December and to take advantage of the good weather for an outdoor party.

Now that she’s six turning seven, she can’t wait that long. But throwing a party in early December is like loading an already toppling plate of Christmas cookies with a big fat cupcake.

We’ll always do a little family celebration on her real birthday, but I think she’s old enough now to wait until early January for a party, when the slate is clean and mom has more time and energy to devote.

Head on over to Dagmar’s Momsense for 9 Ways to De-Stress and Spend Less Over the Holidays, and then let us know how you manage to take a few cookies off your plate.

Sending you a few deep breaths and a big hug,

Amy

Simplify Your Giving to Teachers and Friends: a Loving Low-Cost Solution

Amy — Sat, 27 Nov 2010 21:40:46 +0000

Twinkling lights, Christmas carols, and the smell of pumpkin pie make me feel all glowy and wanting to do nice things for others. However, I have to be careful to not overdo it.

All this talk about simplifying the holidays gets thrown into the bonfire if we pile on too many craft projects, baking enterprises, or complicated care packages.

If you have the money, buying gifts is pretty quick and easy. Teachers and bus drivers, mail carriers and doormen always appreciate a gift card.

If you are trying to cut down, things get more complicated. Let’s face it: the amount of money you save is directly related to how much time you spend.

Here is an idea that can not only save you both time and money, but it can also make someone feel really good. If you want to get more elaborate, just add an extra step.

Give a Two-Line Handwritten Card

Buy them at the dollar store or make them out of construction paper. (We made these cards in literally ten minutes.) Start each sentence with the same four words:

Dear…

Thank you for… [something they do that you love -- even just being a trusted friend]

I… [something specific that you love about them, or how you benefited from, learned from or were helped by them -- people love to feel needed]

The more specific you can get, the better. Words like nice, good, and best have good intentions but don’t really tell someone how you feel.

And stop there. Really.

If You Really Want to Get More Elaborate…

If you are going to write a family letter anyway or print out photos — and they are ready — include a copy.

If your children like working with crayons or paints, and enjoy helping to get ready for the holidays, involve them by all means. But it’s not worth cajoling and pleading, or creating a mess that will make you more stressed.

If you love making holiday sweets, or if you are baking anyway and can double the recipe, throw three to four of your goodies in a little plate or bag and tie a ribbon around it.

But all this extra stuff is just, well, extra.

Your two sentences are what people will remember.

Don’t you think? Let me know in the comments section below.

Don’t Cut Off Your Hair: Ask For What You Need

Amy — Thu, 18 Nov 2010 18:31:01 +0000

Remember the story about the young and poor married couple who wanted to surprise each other for Christmas? The man sold his treasured pocket watch so he could buy a fancy hair comb for his wife. She sold her long beautiful hair to buy a chain for his pocket watch.

That’s the problem with surprises. Yes, they’re terribly romantic, but sometimes they’re just terrible.

It took me a few years to convince my husband that we should save money by getting each other something we needed, instead of surprising each other with sometimes frivolous and under-used gifts.

My Best Man Present

If you’re really into keeping gifts secret, try to figure out what it is your spouse needs. My husband often complained about how our towels were always damp and cold, having no way to dry on their towel rack behind the door in our cramped bathroom. I came up with a behind-the-door towel warmer, which remains the most successful present for my husband ever.

Need? you may scoff. But really it was a towel dryer. The best part is that we both experience this gift every day with the sensation of absorbent, toasty towels. (Plus it only consumes the energy of a 60-watt bulb.)

(Unfortunately, Hinge-It doesn’t seem to be making this hinge-mounted, behind-the-door towel warmer anymore, but wall-mounted towel warmers or stands are plentiful.)

Another Good Present

One the best presents I get from my parents is a lump sum to spend on clothes when I come home to visit. OK, it’s a little mortifying that I’m now 41 and my parents are still clothing me, but maybe they figure that this is just about the only way to get me into a dressing room. I mean, what’s fun about shopping with a bunch of rowdy kids, or trying on 78 pairs of pants in an hour?

With the gift scenario instead, my parents watch the kids and, although I still have to try on 78 pairs of pants, at least I don’t have to worry about the bill. In fact it’s kind of like a game seeing how much I can get for $200, or whatever it is. I usually go somewhere like TJMaxx or a goobery department store that has great clearance racks.

It’s true there is nothing to open up and ooh and ahh over, but I come home afterwards, and just like when I was a teenager with a budget for a fall wardrobe, I model all the bargains I found. (The narrated fashion show is just as much about the price as the style.)

Invest in Something that Won’t Collect Dust

My husband wasn’t too thrilled when I first brought up this practical approach to Christmas presents.

“No, but you should just go out and buy a set of mixing bowls,” he argued. “That’s not a present.” He kept wanting to wow me with something unexpected and glittery.

Who doesn’t love sparkly? — and what a scrooge I am to discourage a romantic like him — but as a frugal mama, I was thinking: you could have wrapped up that garage door opener, and I would have been just as happy.

Here are some more ideas for gifts that feel special, but don’t fit on the knick-knack shelf.

A warm, fuzzy robe and slippers.
A coupon for a month (or season) of paid-for lawn care, snow shoveling, or garage organizing. The time saved can be spent with the family or hanging out with friends.
A new briefcase or purse/diaper bag. (For our ten-year wedding anniversary, I invested in one of these old-world Italian leather briefcases for my husband, which I found at 40% off at Briefcases.com.)
A cozy throw blanket for cuddling on the couch.
Equipment for a loved sport.
A gift certificate to a beauty store like Sephora.
A bird feeder and a large bag of seed.
A wool sweater or a no-iron shirt (OK, maybe the person who does the ironing needs this more!)
A set of yoga classes (and childcare to make it possible).
A book, magazine subscription, online service or tools that feed a hobby or passion.
A labor-saving device like a food processor. Mark Bittman claims its the only kitchen appliance you need.

What things do you need that you wish your family would give you? Please share your gift ideas with us in the comments section.

Photo credits: pocket watch, towel on heater, clothes.